Home Piss + Nas On Colbert Report (Video)

I am trying to think of a new title for the hometitle (titlebar name) of my blog…

I was thinkin of this slogan: Shabooty.com: “if your daughters are dating me, you have failed as a parent, but have won as a “cool dad.”

Or maybe, I’ll just stick with Shabooty.com: Howard Stern, HipHop, & Booty.

Btw, in my dream last night, Barack Obama was my math teacher. He stopped back from his trip, for exam week to do the math exam, ‘cept like it was “exam time,” so you know you have to be all sullen and quiet. So, I couldn’t really give him a “HOOTYHOO”

and give him a fist bump. :(
A shame, I know.

Anyways - check out Nas on the Colbert Report:

The Colbert Report and Nas discuss the racism on Fox News and Bill O’Reilly. Nas talks about his protest against Fox News and performs his song “Sly Fox.”

Colbert always comes off sorta hacky, but o’ well, so does Nas.

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Permalink Posted in: comedy, hiphop, music, tv, video Comments(0) July 25, 2008

Want To Win A Date With Byata? You Shmoe!

The only kunt muscle on Vh1’s laughable, Miss cRap Supreme worthy of any recognition (aside from recognizing the talentless Khia as a fat heffer), is the Russian Byata chick from Brooklyn. She has sass, a lil bit of ass, and some talent. And, apparently [she] was the 2nd runner up on the show.

So, after using one’s 15 minutes of fame on this cruddy vh1 series, what is a female rapper left to do?

How about charging fans 20$ bucks for a raffle ticket, so that maybe they’ll win the opportunity to go out on a date with Byata, (which she’ll be recording for her myspace page). Sheesh, way to perpetuate the Russian Bride (or date in this case) stereotype. Why don’t I buy Byata fake tits too while I’m at it… buying her $20 raffle tickets. Anyways, here is the official press release (and what an annoying all caps one at that it is):

BEFORE YOU READ THIS I MUST SAY THAT IN NO WAY IS THIS A SCAM OR AM I TRYING TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF MY FANS…

MUSIC AND ENTERTAINMENT IS HOW I EAT…THIS IS MY JOB, MY LIFE, MY FUTURE, AND ALL I HAVE!!!

I PROVIDE A SERVICE FOR MY TRUE FANS…FANS THAT WANT TO SUPPORT MY ARTS.

AND FOR THOSE WHO DONT WANT TO SUPPORT THEN YOU CAN BYPASS THIS BULLETIN CUZ I DONT NEED ANYBODY KNOCKIN MY HUSSLE…

I DONT KNOCK YOURS!

TO ALL MY LADIES & GENTLEMEN…

WANNA CHANCE TO WIN A NIGHT OUT IN “YOUR” TOWN WITH BYATA???

SEND $20 CHECK OR MONEY ORDER TO:

BYATA INC.
PO BOX 46570
LOS ANGELES, CA 90046

ALSO ENCLOSE A NOTE WITH YOUR NAME, EMAIL, ADDRESS AND PHONE #…

ONCE THE PAYMENT HAS BEEN RECEIVED I WILL SEND YOU A GOODY BAG FULL OF BYATA MERCHANDISE…ALONG WITH A RAFFLE TICKET…

HOLD ON TO YOUR RAFFLE TICKET LADIES & GENTS CAUSE IN OCTOBER THE WINNER WILL BE ANNOUNCED…

AND ONCE THAT HAPPENS…BYATA WILL BE FLYING OUT TO YOUR HOMETOWN TO SPEND AN EVENING WITH YOU AND YOUR FRIENDS IF YOU’D LIKE TO BRING THEM!

THERE WILL BE A CAMERA TAPING THE “DATE” AND IT WILL BE POSTED ON BYATA’S MYSPACE PAGE AS WELL AS YOUTUBE…

OH YE…THE WINNER ALSO RECIEVES A TOP SPOT ON BYATA’S MYSPACE FRIEND LIST FOR A MONTH!

GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!PEACE,
BYATA
WWW.BYATA.COM

I don’t think I am officially knocking the hustle am I? More so just goofing on it. I will say and have said in the past, Byata was the only good thing to come out of that show (plus, I think she’s cute). I love that chick’s intestinal fortitude. It’s a major turn on… you know, in a russian bride turned rapper kinda way.

P.s. Oh, and I’m not saying Byata can’t beat me up. That chick is swole.

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Permalink Posted in: chick, music, tv Comments(1) July 22, 2008

Real World Hollywood Reunion = A Times Square Unbeweavable Borefest

The Real World Hollywood Reunion was a bore-fest. Surprisingly boring basically –the Tila2 reunion was way more entertaining. I dunno who that British host was, but she sucked (thou better than the Tila2 reunion’s host). The only thing that sucked worse, was that Carlos guy down in Times Square that they kept throwing to. If they wanted to get a fruity looking Mexican fruit to be a correspondent, they coulda got Trent. At least he has a personality.
Anyways… and the most interesting part of the reunion? Apparently the ’sistas’ on the show did turn hollywood… and by that I mean they straightened their HURRE (hair). Here are some shots below. The dumb fuc*ing host coulda asked em about their new looks, no? What, am I the crazy one?

“It’s just my personality, I like to have fun –usually I’m just really happy,” “Wahhhh, I kissed another guy when I have a boyfriend, and now I straightened my hair, wahhh” — Brittani

Brianna - Before Pic

Brianna - After Pic

Brianna - After Pic

Brittani - Before Pic

Brittini - After Pic

Brittani - After Pic

Brianna & Brittini

Janelle - Before Pic

Janelle - After Pic

Janelle - After Pic (left)

Yesss, you’re seeing correct, Janelle redid her fuc*ing hair too, right? God, that’s annoying.

Jump the shark x 3 meters.

Anyways, in actuality, the last 2 segments are the only worthy ones. A) When Janelle goes on and confronts the supreme asshole Will, breaking his balls, and B) the un-aired never shown before footage package. The funny part also is that in the version that aired on TV, The “Tres” Amigos (Will, Nick and Dave) Plugged their upcoming gigs…as in a tour of bars across the country, Will plugged the cd he’s working on, and Brianna plugged her forthcoming album as well. And the version on the interwebs on MTV.com, MTV basically ripped all of the plugging out of the web-feed, lol. That’s sorta funny. I guess they’re shoving the minute hand on to the 15, asap.

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Permalink Posted in: comedy, humor, los angeles, real world, shabooty exclusive, show, tv Comments(5) July 17, 2008

Brittany Rae of MTV’s Tila Tequila Dating Show, A Shot At Love 2, Comes To The Defense Of Kristy

15 minutes of dykey fame never looked so good.

I can only explain this in a run-on sentence, because that’s the only way I can re-count lesbian reality tv bullshit, w/o my head exploding.
So it goes, Tila eliminates/dumps Brittany, and Bo, picks Kristy, Kristy dumps Tila on her own show, Tila flames Kristy on her myspace blog, then again in-person on the reunion show, goes apeshit on Kristy, Kristy eventually also storms off stage saying, “you want to know why? [i didn't want your love], cause you’re a BITCH”… this then led to an interwebs flame war between TIla’s fans and Kristy. And well, this below is a myspace blog in which Brittany comes to the defense of Kristy. Sounds like the story line for the L-Word, eh? I can see the kraft services table with tunafish already.

i know what it feels like to have to take a step back and give someone room because they are unsure, because when u CARE about someone, u wanna make them as comfortable as u can, and if youre MATURE u know that forcing someone into a relationship when theyre not ready is only gonna hurt you both in the end! so u need to either wait it out, or move on. she has been nothing but misunderstanding and mean, posting hate blogs about kristy acting like shes 12 using the internet to start shit. and that immature kinda bullshit COMPLETELY TURNS ME OFF.

FULL READ

~~~

I agree. Tila’s a cunt, and shouldn’t have a career outside of the pho industry.

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Permalink Posted in: celebs, chick, myspace, quotes, show, tv Comments(2) July 14, 2008

MTV’s A Shot At Love 2 (Tila Tequila 2), Reunion Show Full Episode

Tila Tequila Reunion Show…Things get so heated between Tila and Kristy that they can no longer be in the same room.

This is the smile that comes to my face when I see Tila a) Cry

b) Act cunty c) Kristy also walks off stage calling her a BITCH!
Fuck Tila! And props to Kristy. Oh this is segment 6 of 6 (the best one of the reunion), to watch it from the beginning, go here.

Also, an update on how wacked out of her skull, Tila is… temporarily her MySpace profile was headlined “KRISTY IS FAKE! USED ME TO GET ON TV!”. She then posted a blog titled “BITCHES AIN’T SHIT BUT HOES AND TRICKS!” (which has since been deleted -I think her handlers told her to STFU, Dumb gook). Which said:

“Thunderfuck my mouth is shut. Been a while, feel like a cunt. / Can’t wait for this drama to pass.” It also said, “For a long time coming….I let you touch me….now that it’s over bitch….You better start running. Pent up inside….telling these lies….this has gone too far…..the world will soon die.”

I think the real reason that Tila is all pissed off is because she sees her 15minutes of fame clocking in at 14minutes and 15seconds. Tick tock tick tock. Please just stop making music Tila…spare us all!
$

Permalink Posted in: model, music, show, tv Comments(0) July 12, 2008

Odds and Ends: iPhone 2.0 Software Released, . . .

‘Official’ iPhone firmware 2.0 now available for download.

The new iPhone 3G launched today at 8 am. Where was I? Passed out on my friend’s couch. I am passing on this latest iPhone. The 15$ a month on top of what I currently pay, plus the fact that most of the new features (aka Firmware 2.0 with the Apps Store), work with my first gen iPhone, help make this decision for me.

Steve the Woz Wozniak agrees:

“A little faster downloading of webpages, and it has a GPS [Global Positioning System] chip built in. But, you know, these aren’t, like, break-the-bank items…A lot of the people I know just aren’t going to upgrade yet.”

The facebook app, myspace app, weatherbug, and twitterific on the iPhone have so far been impressive!

On to some other things,

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Permalink Posted in: apple, gadget, iphone, show, tv, video, youtube Comments(0) July 12, 2008

Real World Hollywood [Before and] Afterthoughts

MTV’s Real World Hollywood (Season 20) concluded this week, so I figured I would go back and consider my first-impressions of the cast based on episode one, and compare it to how I feel about those same people, at the end of the full season. I am curious to see how accurate I was in terms of judging their character. The original post is here, where I basically trash em all [after one episode].

The blockquotes are the initial thoughts, followed by what I think of them, present day.

[Greg] The pretty boy guy was in a shtick-coma, yet didn’t have any comedic whit to pull it off, so he just looked like a gay buffoon.

I would say that was a fairly accurate statement. Buffoonery is when you’re kicked off the show because you refuse to go to your realworld ‘job’. Dum dum.

[Brianna] The stripper chick ….uhh she reminds me of, who’s that albino rapper? Yeah her name should be Sister Ali. That bitch looked almost see-thru, or like predator fell into a giant vat of concealer.

Lol, yep she’s the stripper chick, but she was def proven to be kewl peoples. Cept for the fact that she’s crazy, but that’s a good thing.

[Joey] The one buff steroid head from Chicago was a Brad-rehash. He officially made Chanel earrings jump the shark.

Actually I take that back. Joey’s mad cool, and Brad from prior season is a douche (I’ve met him in person before -referring to Brad). Anyway, Joey rocks.

[Will] The dred-locked fellow token-black (I don’t care if there are two brothers on the show) they’re still token blacks on “MTV Real World,” he was all about the stripper bitch, but as soon as his dumb ass realized she was a fucked up stripper he got all scared. Who cares dude, clamidia won’t make your dreds fall out. I think.

Will is the guy I probably despise the most. Yes, he’s still a dumb ass. And a snake. Who the fuck goes into the bathroom to make their eyes water up/faux tears and all to win a girl back?

[Kimberly & Dave] The frigging wonderbread white dude, and the wonderbread white girl, what is there to say? I just will say, that how is that bitch expecting to be a reporter on “E!” TV (first of all, if your ultimate dream job/goal in life is to work at E! fucking TV, you have a problem right there)…fucking schmaltzy ass bitch. Anyways, the point I was trying to make is that she’s annoying and that I wouldn’t able to last thru any journalism work she does.

Lol. See the last episode when she chokes trying to interview Shanna Mokler. Who is only ’still’ famous for banging that drummer dude.

[Sarah] The brunette chick, shrug…she’s dumb. She went to ASU. Her degree should say: “Women are life-support systems for pussies-OLOGY BACHELOR OF QUEEFS DEGREE.”

I’ll actually say that Sarah is pretty smart. I still can’t stand her though. I feel bad for her boyfriend. Cause she’s a major pain in the ass.

Who else am I missing? I think that’s about it…I think all of these mediocre cast-members, “WITH THEIR POWERS COMBINED” just might not be a giant douchey-cluster-fuck. Why can’t a hurricane or earthquake strike down on these douche-chill giving assholes, like the Key West season? :)

Fair statement right? Anyways, the only cast members I actually like, are Brianna and Joey. The rest can suck a dick, that is served in a bowl.

$

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Permalink Posted in: los angeles, shabooty exclusive, show, tv, ventilation Comments(5) July 11, 2008

A Shot At Love 2 - Tila Tequila FINALE | Full Episode 10 Online | Fire and Ice

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In a very dramatic conclusion, Tila finally chooses the person with whom she’s found love.

This the greatest finale only for the last five minutes of the episode. All I’ll say is “GOOOOOOOOOOD!” in an attempt to not spoil it. Let’s just say I was happy when the ending, and how things turned out.

$

Permalink Posted in: show, tv, video Comments(2) July 3, 2008

Shabooty Interview Series: Henry Hill

Henry Hill … where does one start in describing Henry Hill’s storied life, a life that has inspired everything from books, movies and restaurants. Henry is the main character (played by Ray Liotta) in the true-life story, and Marty Scorsese classic: GoodFellas. Henry is a former mobster, who was in the witness protection program, but has since reemerged, turning his celebrity into a showbiz career. If you ask me, he has also provided some of the most memorable and entertaining appearances by any guest ever on “The Howard Stern Show“. Caramel macchiato, anyone?

—

Shabooty: Hey Hendry! So, are you buddies with Ray Liota?
Henry Hill: Not buddies, but I do see him occasionally. I ran into him a couple months ago in Venice around Christmas time — Cool dude.

Stern fans want to know, what’s your opinion on Lisa G [Howard100 News reporter]?
Don’t remember her…

Is your favorite coffee drink a caramel macchiato?
Love those things, but too fattening.

Have you ever played GTA(GrandTheftAuto), the video game? (main character voiceover done by Ray Liotta).
Sure yeah, I’ve played before. (But I don’t own it).

You’re now doing your “mob-art”. Who/what are your inspirations in art?
I love art, been to art museums, enjoy it, looking at it, long as it’s decent, but it’s all decent.

How is the art selling?
It’s doing well. Keeps me out of trouble, roof over head, I enjoy doing it, [it is] therapy for me.

Are most of the paintings mob related?
Some of them are, some aren’t. Whatever I’m in the mood to do… I love to do skylines of New York, all kinds of weird shit.

You have a spaghetti sauce?
Yeah, Henry Hill’s WiseGuys Sunday Gravy –it will be in grocery stores this year.

What new Hollywood endeavors are you working on?
I finished the script, “Final Four” –about the Boston College scandal. I’m working on a TV thing with a couple cool dudes. Part reality [show]… spent months filming already [to prepare a pilot/teaser to shop around to the networks] –maybe A&E.

Drinking these days?
I sneak one a week… once in a couple weeks [I might have a] couple beers.

How’s the health?
I have an operation upcoming.  Wednesday I have a pre-operation cat scan for my double hernia.

Who’s your favorite actor?
[Robert] Dinero’s one of the best, love everything he’s in.

What’s the better mob movie - The Godfather or GoodFellas?
What you think I’m gonna say? Godfather was real hollywood-ish, it wasn’t a true story ya know, but a great movie. Don’t get me wrong on the Godfathers –just GoodFellas is a different kind of movie, Scorsese’s movie, ya know… true story.

When was your first appearance on Howard Stern?
12 years ago.

Permalink Posted in: artie lange, celebs, howard stern, interview, los angeles, movie, shabooty, shabooty book club, shabooty exclusive, sirius, tv Comments(7) June 29, 2008