Home Piss + Nas On Colbert Report (Video)

I am trying to think of a new title for the hometitle (titlebar name) of my blog…

I was thinkin of this slogan: Shabooty.com: “if your daughters are dating me, you have failed as a parent, but have won as a “cool dad.”

Or maybe, I’ll just stick with Shabooty.com: Howard Stern, HipHop, & Booty.

Btw, in my dream last night, Barack Obama was my math teacher. He stopped back from his trip, for exam week to do the math exam, ‘cept like it was “exam time,” so you know you have to be all sullen and quiet. So, I couldn’t really give him a “HOOTYHOO”

and give him a fist bump. :(
A shame, I know.

Anyways - check out Nas on the Colbert Report:

The Colbert Report and Nas discuss the racism on Fox News and Bill O’Reilly. Nas talks about his protest against Fox News and performs his song “Sly Fox.”

Colbert always comes off sorta hacky, but o’ well, so does Nas.

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Permalink Posted in: comedy, hiphop, music, tv, video Comments(0) July 25, 2008

F-Ing Thunderstorm Woke My Crusty Ass Up

Is it just me or has the special effects/costuming quality in pornos these days skyrocketed in quality? NSFW.

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Bert & Ernie tries Gangsta-Rap

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Yes, the new wordpress iphone application is out. I did a draft post last night with it. It works pretty good. I look forward to mobile blog at concerts on the fly (granted I have a signal). Check it out.

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I dedicate this:

Samuel L. Jackson - baltimore club mix

To Khia “DJ K-Swift” Edgerton…RIP.

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Check out this:
A.P.T. Song - Obama Obama (Lil Wayne “A Milli” Remake)

The only thing it’s lacking is more cowbell.

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Here’s Jack:

No Brian! Those Chicken Wings Are Really Spicy, Don’t Eat Those (YTMND)

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The following statements are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

And the best for last:

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

WITNESS: No.

ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?

WITNESS: No.

ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?

WITNESS: No.

ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?

WITNESS: No.

ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?

WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?

WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

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Awwww. They care! (Sarcasm Sandwich)

That above is attributable to one of my favorite authors -but I won’t say who (but thanks for replying to my email, unsaid author).

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Lastly…fu*k thunderstorms.

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Permalink Posted in: hiphop, humor, kobe, los angeles, max barry, music, myspace, nsfw, odds and ends, video, youtube Comments(0) July 23, 2008

Weekend Suicide Girls

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Mark Ronson sounds so fruity, but the dude can produce, plus his sister is banging Lindsay Lohan:

Nas ft. Busta Rhymes - Fried Chicken

Oh, and don’t try googling this song, cause yes an advertisement for KFC -WILL come up:

Permalink Posted in: chick, hiphop, suicide girls Comments(0) July 19, 2008

El-P’s WeAreAllGoingToBurnInHellMeggamixx2 Download For Free!

Who knew that blankcds could be your gain. In other words, El-P released a tour-only mix tape, but some of the discs were un-burned blankcds (hence some pissed off jukieheads). Anyways, somewhat PR conscious (or he just got annoyed of people leaving comment spam on his blog, bitching about the cds), El-P has decided to give this mixtape for free. Though, a heads-up, you will have to register an account on definitivejux.net. If Goodyear made running shoes, put on your Run-Flats and sprint to cop this ish… it’s hot.

Quote:

from producto…with love

I have decided to make the mp3s of disc one of theWEAREALLGOINGTOBURNINHELLMEGGAMIXX2 (tour only limited edition double disc cds) available for free. You won’t get the Eat My Garbage CD (disc 2), nor will you get the amazing original artwork by Travis Millard or the bragging rights of owning a cd that is going for 150 (so ive been told) bucks a pop on EBAY. But to be honest i felt kind of bad not letting fans who weren’t able to go to the shows hear this stuff.Also, for those lucky 500 who bought the limited pressings I am offering to replace any of the cds that may have been blank. Unfortunately I have heard that a small portion were, which sucks dick and makes me feel like an asshole at the same time. So in a bid to quell the justified pain and borderline rage some have felt popping in a blank cd please send your blank cd to Def Jux

115 South Oxford St.Suite 556
Brooklyn NY 11217
and we will send you a replacement of the cd only, keep your packaging. love, el

go to to download:

http://www.definitivejux.net/news/el-p/438

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Permalink Posted in: brooklyn, ccwm, defjux, el-p, hiphop, music Comments(0) July 9, 2008

D.I.D.D.Y: Dream-Ing-Daily-Dish-Yayson.

Dream Log: 7-5-08

Lol, I just remembered my dream last night. I was in bumfuck god knows where and there was a mad gunman shootin’ up a neighborhood… Next thing I know, some sniper out of no where shoots dude down and I look from the bushes and it’s P.Diddy!!! (you know how Shaq is a cop in some jurisdictions), so Diddy wuz this cop there, lol. And I start talking to him and shit and then I get into interviewer mode like, “Yo Diddy can I just ask you like 5 quick questions on the spot and call it an interview?” and I ask him one question and instead his f-ing making the band guys answer the q and I am like dudez, stfu, I only want Diddy to answer. So we’re walking inside this building and there’s this black Lamborghini that some folks are doing a photoshoot with, and I am like, ‘yoo take my pic!,’ So I go by the car to get my pic taken, and then I look back, and Diddy bounced the fuck out! Like 20 mins later, I get a text from him saying ‘My bad yo, I had to fly back to NY cause the Knicks are playin’, ‘but tell me more about that shabooty.com…’

~

Diddy’s making the band & the dream log. No homo.

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Read the rest of this entry »

Permalink Posted in: celebs, dream log, hiphop, shabooty, shabooty exclusive, show Comments(0) July 5, 2008

My Mind Is On Carmen Sandiego’s G550 Jet. I’ve Lost It, And Waldo Is Being A Douche On His Two-Way Pager.

Carmen Sandiego - I’m all over the place.

Just some random thoughts going on… I missed the Tila 2 finale last night? Did I? Well, I am sure it was lame. I know way hotter Vietnamese chicks in Texas than her. She’s a fidget anyway.

So, did you hear about the new iPhone coming out on July 11th? Really cheap: $199 and $299 respectively… If you look under the hood though and by hood I mean AT&T’s pricing plan on the service side, that same unlimited data goes from 20$ to 30$ a month and those free 200 txt messages, that’s now five dollars. Want the 1500 txt message package? That goes from 10$ to 15$ a month. So for me, that would total an additional 15$ a month or… quick math $145. er, fuck I can’t add: 180. Either way that blows, $igh.

What’s up with milfs these days, esp the “newly” divorced ones. Not only will they ask you what knd of car you drive, but’ll if you happen to be in your friends car, they’ll ask what car your friend’s driving too…wtf.
Way to take the LF out of milf, okay nm, that’s still in effect despite the golddiggery.
Be a mother, get rid of the damn eyebrow-piercing-ring. Why attract attention to your eyes, where crows feet lay, right? You’re not 18 anymore. And you’re 30 going on 40.

I hope Artie Lange is okay in Iraq, where he is performing this week on the USO Show tour.

Amy Whinehouse called Kanye West a cunt. How great is that?

Did you know the next Survivor is being filmed right now in Africa?

Fu*k I hate spam like this, New message: “why is your myspace photo here on this site.. laquinka . com
”
I dunno, let me rush on over to la-quin-ka.com real quick and see.

There has been much squabble over “shitty parts of NYC to hang out”. By squabble I just mean different sources of opinion saying similar things. And from respectable sources. Apparently El-P & Alaska of Hangar18 both hate Williamsburg section of Brooklyn. I thought that was the hip-artsy-fartsy cool part of town. Shows you how much I know. But I still rep BKNY. Cue…

El-P:

editor’s note: Williamsburg - im not talking about williamsburg. williamsburg is the only place in brooklyn that sucks harder than manhattan as a rule no matter what the circumstance.

Alaska:

Williamsburg – I don’t know a single person that likes that pisshole yet people are always going there, hey someone is spinning some shitty MIA at a loft party, or let’s go to this shitty as boutique my friends dad bought, they have like one sneaker, four pairs of jeans and a coffee table book. People dress like the tourists in Times Square and have shitty mustaches it might as well be Milwaukee, sorry Milwaukeeans I didn’t mean to insult you because although you guys dress like that you do shower and aren’t a bunch of pretentious pricks who base their whole personality off what pitchfork.com thinks and whichever t-shirt is recommended in the latest issue of Vice.

Pwned!

Word on the street is to find Waldo El-P Sandiego, ya just gotta go to the lower east side of Manhatty, or just let him tell you where he hangs out.

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Permalink Posted in: apple, artie lange, brooklyn, ccwm, celebs, comedy, defjux, el-p, hiphop, howard stern, humor, iphone, music, myspace, nightlife, odds and ends, quotes, reviews, shabooty, ventilation Comments(0) July 2, 2008

Kanye West In Hindsight

Back when I was at the University of Maryland (2004), Kanye West had just dropped his first album, College Dropout, and he wuz hot and bout to ‘blow’ fo’ real (blow up). I ain’t gonna front, a Kanye West show even at that early point in time in a 500-600 capacity room (ballroom), was pretty hot to def. He asked for folks if anyone had his new cd on em, he’ll sign it for em, but also that he needs the actual cd, so he can put on a joint he didn’t have handy. (This was the pre-wack glasses KanYe). He was rockin a collared shirt, and a lil LouisVitton backpack… n he made sure the crowd was into it, stopping a couple times at the begining to make sure the crowd was makin’ the proper ample noise, and had their hands up. N I ain’t gonna front he put it down and it was rockin. This was the pre-jump the shark Kanye if you ask me.

In between songs he even related to the DC area peeps too, saying how he has a cousin or family up in this area (he pronounced Rockville, MD, Rock-Ville, and mentioned he stayed a summer down here in Wheaton in his past). So I mean he kept it real. He even brought on his lil cousin on the stage and let her say hi. He wasn’t blinged up or anything. Anyways, to get to the most interesting part of his in between song, banter was how close he and his mother were. He was quite candid, saying how his mom told him, “you best strap up –wear two rubbers if you have too, –’that money is ours.” Referring to –KanYe best not be knockin no broads up and losing half his dough type of shit. So his Mom was def. not playing, and being he’s a mommas boy -she had a straight line into Hollywood-dom, which of course led to her getting plastic surgery and her ultimate death. I just found all of that interesting. The point being was that’s the Kanye I liked. The one willing to do a show of 500 college students, willing to talk about his personal shit, about his convos with his Mother about chicks, signing a cd or two right there on the spot, and keeping it real. He even did a slick move, I have to give him props, he pulled out a cd from his LV backpack (he made it a point that it wasn’t just for show that he actually was carrying shit in it). So anyways, he pulls out a cd from his backpack, puts it on (an instrumental), and starts flowin a lil over it, claiming “eh ya’ll this is the next hit -you’ll be hearing this shit next SUMMER.” Gully stuff true true. Since then though, this is what has happened. He’s taking pictures with Mohammad Ali, making Ali wear those goofy f-ing glasses. What the f…

You don’t see me taking pics with Ron Jeremy making him wear goofy condoms. No homo.

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pic hat tip: bol

Permalink Posted in: anecdote, aviators, celebs, concert, hiphop, music, shabooty, shabooty exclusive, terp Comments(3) June 25, 2008

Ice-T Responds To Soulja Boy, T’s Son Co-signs

Ice T and his son respond to Soulja Boy

I am on team Ice T… Looks like Kanye West however, is on team Soulja Douche:

Soulja boy is fresh ass hell and is actually the true meaning of what hip hop is sposed to be. He came from the hood, made his own beats, made up a new saying, new sound and a new dance with one song. He had all of America rapping this summer. If that ain’t Hip Hop then what is? A bunch of wannabe keep it real rappers that ain’t even relevant, recycling samples trying to act like it’s 96 again and all they do is hate on new shit? Niggas always talk about the golden age but for a 13 year old kid, this is the golden age!!! That song was so dope cause everything he said had a hidden meaning… that’s Nas level shit… he just put it over some steel drums which is also some Nas shit if you had the 2nd album cassette with the bonus track “Silent Murder” on it. In closing… new niggas get ya money$$$$$$$$$$ Keep this shit fresh and original…. ain’t no fuckin’ rules to this shit and that’s what real hip hop is to me

Do you think…
I dunno bout you, but I think Lake Michigan (the Great Lake next to Chicago) must have a shark or two swimming in the waters, cause I am pretty sure if they looked up in the sky, they’d see Kanye’s [on-stage prop] Spaceship flying overhead.

[hat tip: bol]
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Permalink Posted in: hiphop, music, ventilation, video Comments(1) June 23, 2008

Nas - Be A Nigger Too (Video)

Video Directed By Rik Cordero

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Permalink Posted in: hiphop, music, video Comments(2) June 22, 2008

New Poll Up (Who Is The Biggest Douchebag?) + Last Week’s Results

The results are in to my surprise, most of you over 75% think the Iraq trip for Artie will be a good one, and healthy for him. I think that will be the case but  I am still a little cynical about the whole thing. His health is a big question mark. I think if he can keep himself busy though it’ll be a worthwhile and heroic trip.

New poll up:

Who is the biggest Douchebag/of the week?

-50 Cent (releases Young Buck tape of Buck crying on the phone)

-YoungBuck (releases 50 cent diss song -also says F-*K G-Unit on stage during performance)

-Ice-T (tells Soula Boy to eat a dick, says he ruined hiphop single-handedly)

-Soulja boy (Makes a douchey youtube response to Ice-T’s comments)

…

Vote right sidebar.

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Permalink Posted in: 50cent, celebs, hiphop, music, shabooty exclusive, youtube Comments(0) June 21, 2008