Real World Brooklyn Episode 1 + Cast Recap

I just watched MTV’s Real World MTV Brookyln Episode one. I am mainly interested in this season, as I have family near Red Hook… and I am pretty damn sure the “house” is near the Fairway Grocery store. Anyways, here is my cast “recap”.

1. 

   Cast | Baya Twenty-one-year-old Baya’s personality blends her passion for hip-hop culture and laid-back hippie vibe. Despite her outgoing and positive personality and her ability to quickly make friends, she has continually felt like a fish out of water growing… Read More

   shabooty says: Baya is pretty hot… she’s from Utah, she’s into dance, she’s young. Now speaking solely on premonition, I have a strong feeling I am going to despise her by the end of the show. Usually what follows Utah, dancer, and young, is dumb. Let’s just say she’s the Kelly Ann (Sydney season) of this Brooklyn cast.

2. 

   Cast | Chet Don’t let his look fool you: Chet is not your typical punk rock party boy. Despite his tight jeans and affinity for neon clothing, this 23-year-old University of Utah frat boy is one of 10 children in a strict Mormon family. Recently single, Chet’s… Read More

   shabooty says: Chet is another Utah-ian except he fits the Utah stereotype closely… about as close as his skinny jeans are to his ball-bag. He’s a virginal Mormon hipster that probably wears magic underwear like all Mormons. And he asks a million questions. One question: if “we” drowned him in the “Salt Lake” does that mean his body will float easier? Doh.

3. 

   Cast | Devyn A winner of Miss Missouri Teen and Miss America Teen pageants, this beauty queen is the epitome of a girlie-girl. Devyn may be easy on the eyes, but she’s tough on anyone who stands in her way. The 20-year-old Missouri native lives for the… Read More

   shabooty says: Devyn, eh? Who spells Devin, Devyn? A black chick with fake titties, that’s who. Anyways, she’s into the white meat obviously. Reminds me a lot of D.C. chicks, but obvs she aint a fattie like most chicks in the Chocolate City.

4. 

   Cast | JD Life wasn’t always smooth sailing for 22-year-old JD, who was raised by an abusive father unsupportive of his son’s homosexuality. When JD’s godmother took him to Sea World at age five, he vowed that one day he would become a dolphin trainer. He… Read More

   shabooty says: JD is the token gay-guy. After episode one however, I think he gets the credit for being the least of an ASSHOLE of all the housemates. He had Katelynn’s back. Shows the dude is a good guy. Just try not to cry during every cab ride. ;) Oh, and as soon as you heard “dolphin trainer,” please tell me you knew he was a fruit.

5. 

   Cast | Katelynn Katelynn is a native of West Palm Beach, Fla., where she was raised by a religious Italian family. Her strong desire to be a mother stems from her close-knit relationship with her own mom. The 24-year-old is a self-proclaimed computer geek and… Read More

   shabooty says: Katelynn — she is the casting director’s gem or Willy Wonka golden ticket… They threw Katelynn in there so you have something to talk about around the water cooler tomorrow at school. Most of these folks are pretty damn boring. Nothing cuts away boring like a guy who has cut off his dick… or excuse me, inverted it into a man-made vagina that has to be kept open with a… Cue the Howard Stern Siobhan reference: “During the interim between the vaginoplasty and the labiaplasty, Siobhan explained, she must progressively expand the vaginal volume by exercising with placement of dildoes of increasing size. The surgery and the exercise cause no small amount of soreness.” Do I have to keep going? P.S. She looks a little like Trent Reznor, no?

6. 

   Cast | Ryan A small-town Pennsylvania boy with a laid-back personality, Ryan has had his share of action. After enlisting in the army at the age of 17, he served in Iraq and got an eyeful. Now 23, he has returned from his duty with a newfound appreciation for… Read More

   shabooty says: I guess you can say Ryan is the typical ex-Army republican el-douchebag. He reminds me of the kid from SuperBad though, so at least he’s a goof, even if it’s a douchey goof.

7. 

   Cast | Sarah From San Francisco, Sarah may look like another tattooed punk but under her ink is a passionate woman with an intense past. Rising from a traumatic upbringing where she was the victim of sexual abuse, the 22-year-old has dedicated herself to… Read More

   shabooty says: Sarah is the typical Suicide-esque Girl,  whom was sexually abused in her past (allegedly), only banged girls, and is finally on to the dick diet… The only thing I have against her is that I am deathly afraid she is more interesting on the outside than on the inside.

8. 

   Cast | Scott Often perceived to be a “musclehead,” it is hard to believe that this muscular personal trainer used to be a 90-pound weakling. Still, Scott has more to show off than his award-winning abs. Raised in a broken home in Massachusetts, he started a… Read More

   shabooty says: Scott is on the show for the cunty little girls that watch The Hills. Those little dimwits need some narcissistic dude to relate to… because what’s more narcissistic than daddy’s little princess?

Full Video of Episode One after the break…

MTV Real World Brooklyn – Full Episode 1

I will just add/note that it was cool seeing my peoples Aesop Rock on MTV coming in and out of commercial breaks. Plus they used None Shall Pass on “The City”s promo. And MURS’ Fatbeats in-store performance played during the credits. Perhaps they are getting musical cues from this blog.

$

Permalink Posted in: jersey shore, nyc, shabooty exclusive, show, tv, video January 8, 2009