Monthly Archives: May 2005

NEWS AND STERN SHIET
Gay and Straight Men React Differently to Sexual Odors
what does a man-queef do then?

THE NAME GAME
During the news Robin read a story about the most popular names for kids these days. Howard guessed that his name was probably around 962 millionth. According to the book, Howard, was number 779 on the list of most popular names, right between Adonis and Roland. Gary came in with a game in which you had to guess whether a name was more or less popular than the name Howard. Here’s the list:

• Philippe – More popular
• Demetrius – More popular
• Maddox – More popular
• Frederick – Less popular #809
• Arthur – More popular
• Nikko – More popular
• Rigiberto – More popular
• Deshawn – More popular
• Earl – Less popular #943
• Arnold – Less popular
• Abdula – Less popular
• Isaac – Less popular
• Osama and Adolf didn’t make the list

IDOL WORSHIP
After all the arguing Corey Clark finally came into the studio. The first question Howard asked was how the sex with Paula was? Corey said it was great! Not the best, but great! Corey said he’d recommend sex with Paula to anyone. Corey went on to explain how his alleged affair with Paula started. He said that the American Idol producers had pushed him towards going out one night with a bunch of the contestants, which the show later used to make him look bad. He claims that when he was doing an interview about his night out the next day one of Paula’s people slipped him her number. He said he called her and she had him come over her house where she warned him about how she thinks the Idol producers were exploiting all the kids on the show. According to Corey, Paula claimed that the psychiatrists the show has them talk to leak their stories to the press and use the information against them and he shouldn’t talk to them. She also allegedly said that he should work on getting his lawyer and signing his own contracts and to be very wary of whatever the show asked him to sign. After about a month of meetings like that and talking to her on the phone is when they started having sex. After awhile though, Corey was kicked off the show, but not because he was voted off. The official reason FOX kicked him off the show was because he had been charged with assault for hitting his sister (even though that charge was dismissed before he even started on the show) and he had a shoplifting charge against him. Howard both pointed out though that this season they have two people on who have been arrested for drugs and threatening to hit women. Corey said, “exactly!” He believes that FOX and American Idol are out to destroy his career and that’s why he’s come out with this story. Otherwise, he feels American Idol could just bad mouth him in the press all they want without him being able to fight back.

BANG AND TELL
After all the conspiracy theories were hashed over Corey got into the good stuff – namely, details on the sex with Paula. Corey claimed to have always been a ladies man, having had babysitters hit on him when he was only five years old and banging girls by the time he was 14. He said that Paula has a really good body for a woman in her 40′s. He said her stomach was tight, no cellulite on her ass, and her boobs were great. Not perky, but not saggy either .Corey also believes that Paula’s boobs are real. He said that they were soft, not hard like fake ones he’s felt. He claimed he only used a condom a few of the times he had sex with her but other times he went “bare back”. Howard asked if he pulled out to make sure that she didn’t get pregnant but he said nah, he just let it fly. He said they used to go in her Jacuzzi/bathtub together and watch music videos and American Idol. He also claimed she is quiet in bed but he likes that. Here are some more details about Paula and Corey’s sex life that he claims are true:

— He has grabbed her hair and smacked her ass on numerous occasions

— She is groomed in the “landing strip” style down stairs

— When asked, Corey enthusiastically said Paula swallows his “protein shakes”. He said she loves them and keeps herself healthy by drinking them.


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May 10, 2005

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F|_|CK THE CHINA BUFFET
I really dunno where to start with this bullsh*t
basically here is the run down:
Me and the lovely lady in my life get to this Chinese Buffet appropriately named China Buffet (who was the genius behind that one?) anyways we get there, check out the food and I decide I guess we should eat here since we are STARVING. We pay and then get a plate and some food and sit down. About 5min later this frickkin c0cksucker aka fagg0t guy that works there (see I’m already getting ahead of myself by calling him names that’s supposed to be for the end of the story) basically in his bad engrish harsh chinese accent tells me something along the lines of “if you need more food –there’s no rush take your time” a couple minutes later I look and the friggin troll railroad workers turned buffet j!zzbucket workers are all taking away the food stacking it up on a cart and carting it away. I am just kinda like WTF?!? I am almost in denial of what just occurred to the point where I just go get some frigging soft serve ice cream sit down eat it and realize just what happened. Just got friggin hustled hardcore sitting there w/ my stomach still mostly on E. I ask the guy at the door to come over and tell him straight up ya all never conveyed to me a) that it was even close to closing time when I got here WTF b) that you were about to take the food away
etc he basically was being a JetLI lookalike D|CK and I asked for this other guy to come over was even more so of a Dick…
he was like “I came by and told you if you want more food get it now -but take your time” WTF hrmm I wonder how someone might misconstrue someone telling them to TAKE THEIR TIME -when he originally came to me, I even asked the guy straight up- yoo so should I get up now and get more food and he was like NOOO take your time … then how come about 2minutes later all of the food was taken away. anyway these fuks were just arguing with me and I could tell this was the kind of establishment that has it’z azn micropenis in it’s ass… therefore, it was no point in arguing.
the nerve of this place… there are signs saying “If you waste food we will charge you” etc fukk that –if you are paying first when ya get there, it’s my money I can waste what I want. The fukking waitresses there probably didn’t speak english either. When I asked them to bring out more food when I first got there (when a couple things were f-in EMPTY), they didn’t say SH*T. They couldn’t even tell me these are the last batches of the night..wtf?
anyways moral of the story is
if you happen to be in CollegePark, MD don’t go to the SHITTY Chinese Buffet.
Nuff said.
if fact if you do go, tell em shabooty sent ya and then piss on their floor, it will make the business’ value go up.
as Scarface would say,
“I’LL BURY THOSE FU%KING COCKAROACHES F U MOTHER F’RRRS!!!!


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May 9, 2005

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MY DRUNKEN AWAY MSG FROM LAST MORNING:
wozerweowozers
grazycrazy friggin frat party =p
aka a party i s goofd when you leave it onlyto come back 10min later
=p
aka yay son going ottoo seleep at 5am yaysongb
=p
—————————————–

AKA
[glen got a party his friend's throwing on college ave]

shabooty
yo whats poppin
8:42
ShadeeTru$t
8:43
» Il pik u up at 10
8:45
shabooty
where ya goin
8:45
 ShadeeTru$t
We got mad party at my boyz house on college av
8:49
shabooty
truetrue
9:27
shabooty
can i tell my roomates bout it
9:30
 ShadeeTru$t
Yea no doubt
11:35
 ShadeeTru$t
12:16 Sunday, May 8, 2005
shabooty
party wuz off the heezy
12:16 pm

my friend has this really funny audio recording from last night, I have to get it from him and post it here—
holla-


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May 8, 2005

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GOOGLE=TEH HAX0RED

Looks like we are having a Google outage – apparently someone has hijacked their Domain, and something called SoGoSearch is showing up instead. GMail was down as well. Google ads are not being served up as well. Am I the only one, or did you guys feel the webquake as well? Man if this is a hack, then we now know nothing – not even god, I mean Google is safe! Is this someone’s idea of teaching them a lesson? Or has the Web Accelerator shown its true colors? Lots of unanswered questions. Here is a screen grab by the way!

READ MORE (UPDATES) HERE & HERE
and here’s some audio on the topic


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May 7, 2005

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GWEN STEFANI

has always been black…she is an inside-out oreo
she dated someone lighter than her when she used to date the
kumar-esque guy in no doubt
the phrase “no doubt” is urban slang
and yes she is a holla back girl
now she dabbles in glisterine
Gwen makes her white boyfriends wear black condoms to emulate the big
black horse cock

nuff said-


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May 7, 2005

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