HAPPY APRIL FOOLS DAY
The quest is to be liberated from the negative, which is really our own will to nothingness. And, once having said yes to the instant, the affirmation is contagious. It bursts into a chain of affirmations that knows no limit. To say yes to one instant, is to say yes to all of existence.

Permalink Posted in: oldschool Comments(0) March 31, 2005

THE LITTLE WHITE RING AROUND URANUS
Via HS.com

Tabitha Stevens’ return to porn is one of the reasons she decided to bleach her rectum. Howard said that Tabitha has already had a ton of work done to her body and wondered how much plastic surgery she’s actually had. Tabitha started to list off a bunch of work she’s had done to her body which includes 6 boob jobs, 3 nose jobs, a nose implant, cheek implants, having fat sucked out of her legs and injected into her face, botox and lip implants. She’s never had liposuction but she wants to. Howard said there wasn’t an ounce of fat on her and couldn’t imagine where she wants to have the fat sucked out. Tabitha’s newest transformation was to have her rectum bleached but that was done with a cream, not a surgery. She said they had to wax out all the hair back there which hurt a lot but said the cream didn’t hurt at all. She just rubs it in before going to sleep at night and it keeps her ass nice and clean looking. Howard asked her to show off what was going on back there so Tabitha disrobed and bent over for everyone to see. At first Howard was having a hard time seeing anything different back there but then Doug Goodstein shined a flashlight on it for a better look. Tabitha said she’d allow one of the guys here to rub the cream on her to demonstrate how the process works but no one jumped at the chance. Finally, resident perv Richard Christy volunteered and donned some white medical gloves to do the deed. He put some of the cream on his finger and even he admitted that this was creepy and he had some reservations about doing it. But being the trooper he is he went and applied the cream and then said he was going to sell that glove at Ebay.

Other rectum-related posts: here & here

Permalink Posted in: oldschool Comments(0) March 31, 2005

SHABOOTY’S MADNESS CAPTION CONTESTâ„¢
It’s APRIL FOOLS, which means it’s time for a Caption Contestâ„¢.
Recaption this B!tACH!!!
Star Jones:

(winner will get a lot of “link back love”)
SO HAVE AT IT!!! :)

Permalink Posted in: oldschool Comments(0) March 31, 2005

THE SHABOOTY DYNASTY
One of tha Dynasty’s members, KUNTA’S KID checked in with me today via txt msg:

Im on my way 2 cali 4 one month and i’ll be home may 2-11 :)
hope 2 c u then.
Countdown 2 baghdad 1.5 months
3/31/05

it’s that real, folks.
the dynasty is 10 deep… and KK is one of the original Four memberz (me, leroy, ole hen, and kunta’s kid)

Chain of command:
shoguns:
shab00ty
fatal image
2nd peeps in command:
philthy phil
kunta’skid
leroy
ole hen
legacy member:
beaviswolf
the only chick:
tasha (can you say robin quivers?)
the rest:
dounutboy
kutter (old head)

TEN DEEP, B!TCHES!
Imma employ all of ‘em one day. . .
:P
(btw if you are curious, those are the 10 most creative/funny peeps I ever met in my life)
if you are a girl, go marry ‘em cause they gonna be famous one day.
$$$

Permalink Posted in: oldschool Comments(0) March 31, 2005

WHOAH, WTF -IT’S TRUE. . .
PEOPLE (CELEBS) DIE IN “THREE’S”

1. Johnny Cochran
2. Terri Schiavo
3. Mitch Hedberg

Permalink Posted in: oldschool Comments(0) March 31, 2005

ONE OF MY FAV. AUTHORS (HIM AND CHUCK P.), MAX BARRY –UNVEILED THE COVER FOR:
Company (2006) -A Novel by Max Barry (HIS NEW -FORTHCOMING- NOVEL)

This morning Doubleday shocked the hell out of me by sending me the book cover for Company. I didn’t even know they’d started work on it, which was crafty of them. If I had, I would have been all over them, raising concerns and highlighting issues. Because I’m helpful like that. Instead: bang! Here it is.
read more

I first viewed it last morning at like 3AM so I was pretty out of it…
here were the comments I left for Max:
“oh I thought it was a bagel at first glance, lol
whoops
:)
let me guess… the back cover has creamcheese on it?
oh wait oh yeah it’s a donut I forgot already.”

In my defenese I was looking at the thumbnail here.
cheers! (congrats Max!!!)
$-

Permalink Posted in: oldschool Comments(0) March 31, 2005

APPROACHING CUMULONIMBUS 9.0!!!
I’m on a cloud #9.5!!! Foreword: if you find “cheery type entries” annoying (I know I do) then you might want to avoid the below post- (:
Days like this tell me I should be a standup comic…just from the feeling one gets.
i just had the most ridiculous (in a good way) euphoric class period… we were debating in class (well a legitimate class debate w/ the class split up on two sides) one side was for peers and the other was about parents (the debate being which has more influence on the adolescence, peers or parents…) we were auto assigned and I was on the parents side…. man, I feel euphoric because i totally killed em (figuratively) being funny lol… I don’t think I could convey it here but I def murdered things (slayed the debating competition) basically I even had the last point that we ended the debate on . . . to which the teacher even added ok I see so taking your last two points… so “parents are the enablers to -get some ass?” (my example was if you buy your teenage son a convertable he’s gonna get some chicks flocking to him -so you would be his enabler) lol who else can get their college professors to say that? (: takes skillz son ….earlier I was saying of a scenario of you talking to your peers “like heyy you get that butt yet? ” etc and I said it in a grimey voice…the class was cracking up…and the teacher was like its ok you can say ass –lol so, after the laughter (including myself) died down, i was like yeaa “so you get that ASS yet?” :) good times -you had to be there (to get the full extent). . .lol prolly the best class I had all semester…really fun. I also was like those girls from broken homes are more promiscuous.. no fathers =looking for father figures and they prolly gonna be strippers …. lol sigh, good game ok, time to get pick up my schezwan beef.

pt2.: premonition
Man, I’m having such a good day today it’s scary… best day of class(es) this semester ;) …. btw you know what’s funny when I was walking late to my class (or any class for that matter –anytime I am traveling in paths or times of day when I am usually in class or dont go that way- I always expect to see new/diff peoplez/friends that i dont normally run into…so I saw one of my friend’s I hadn’t seen in a ages… and I was expecting it- I gotta give props to father fate on that one! :)

Permalink Posted in: oldschool Comments(0) March 31, 2005

SUGE -KNIGHTED, BUT NOT IN ENGLAND…
‘Suge’ Knight Ordered to Pay $107M

LOS ANGELES - A judge has ordered Marion “Suge” Knight to pay $107 million to a woman who claims she helped the rap mogul start Death Row Records, ruling Knight and his attorneys failed to answer questions and provide information in the case.

Superior Court Judge Ronald M. Sohigian ordered Knight and his companies, including Tha Row Inc., to pay Lydia Harris, who claims she is owed money from the recording label she helped establish.

She is married to Michael “Harry O” Harris, an imprisoned drug dealer, who has claimed he put up $1.5 million from behind bars in 1991 to help start Death Row Records. Knight has repeatedly denied that contention.

The judgment includes $60 million in punitive damages, $45 million in economic damages and $2 million in noneconomic damages.
READ REST>>

Permalink Posted in: oldschool Comments(0) March 31, 2005

WIGGEDY WIGGEDY WIGGEDY WACK, SON!
stupid but funny OR funny but stupid?

click to expand

Permalink Posted in: oldschool Comments(0) March 30, 2005

PARDON ME WHILE I DO A LIL’ BASHING
Esp. now that the WHFS[music]festival(HFStival) 2005 has reared it’s ugly head around again this year…bringing along its same cast of trolls.
I have been out of the WHFS (alternative rock D.C. radio station) loop for a while now, ever since they turned into a spanish station (el zol); the junkies went to Fairfax, VA on WJFK and the rest of the HFS people went to the Baltimore Infinity affiliate…. but the fact that I have been out of the loop doesn’t mean that I don’t know that Big-O is a giant shmoe. He is Bolivian…why didn’t he stick at El Zol (spanish station)? He has too much pride in HFS? really beats me. . . the guy is a giant tool though. If ya gave him some rope, he’d think he was a cowboy. He is someone that takes the term “pseudo-celebrity” and takes it and expects a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. He really is the biggest egotistical non-talent I have ever worked around. I say around because it’s hard to get in near vicinity and work WITH someone with a giant proverbial stick protruding out of their ass. I have to give him credit. He basically played The [sports] Junkies as his sheep. Now the two don’t even work at the same station. Oh well, I hope they all rot in obscurity when Stern (now on Infinity radio) moves to Sirius, and then terrestrial radio starts to dry up. Having said all of this. . .here’s a fuc**king plug, Oscar, “Big-O,” for your Hfstival 2005, which you might be putting together, but that doesn’t mean it means shit to me. Basically, all of you fools have jumped the shark, go home. The end.
p.s. Clear Channel sucks my dick thicks, also –let’s not forget.

Permalink Posted in: oldschool Comments(0) March 30, 2005